Starving Beyond Belief…

So, I’m sitting here in my house waiting for my wife to come home so we can go eat lunch together and my stomach is making all sorts of noises(doors opening, floors creaking, air escaping from a balloon, etc.) it’s crazy.  The sad thing is I always get my second choice of eats so, my guess is we’ll be eating Salmon Tacos ant Rubio’s.  And nothing against Rubio’s but, sometimes I want something more filling.  

I’m also going over my Fall Schedule and am looking to fill in a few dates so, any Promoters/Colleges/Universities interested can send an email to me through here or to

Last night, I disconnected the internet while my exchange student EZ was playing Legion of Legends…it was hilarious.  He kept saying he would get banned because he is AFK and since I didn’t know what that meant it made it even funnier.  He was sleeping when I walked in his room and after I said put some shoes on so we can go get something to eat he decided he needed to play his game.  And I don’t play that sh** at all.  He really started playing his game and said to me ‘Give me 20 minutes…’ I was dumbfounded, I didn’t know what else to do but to turn off the internet.  He looked at his computer thinking if he pushed the buttons faster somehow the connection would fix itself.  He’s still learning about me.  I’m about my word.

I’m excited for the Knicks game tonight…

I bought this Tom’s Peppermint toothpaste and about 10 minutes after I brush my teeth the minty fresh is gone.  I drank a glass of water and it washed the freshness away.  What’s up with these natural toothpastes not helping with the problem they’re supposed to be helping with?  Same with the deodorants…if rubbing crystals on my armpits worked things would be different but, it doesn’t work and I’m not sure about anyone who’s had success.  I think I’m going to package pretty rocks in a nice decorative boxes and sell that to people loosing their hair and tell them to soak the rocks in a pancake batter, let it sit over night then, rub gently on head until desired results appear.  Sounds like money in the bank.

So, I think I mentioned we bought these blinds for our bedroom and after paying $140 for them, we decided to get new windows and the new windows are bigger than the blinds we just paid for so we just spent money for no reason.

Also, bought a new trash bin for the kitchen with the sensor to open the lid on it’s own and it’s my new favorite thing.

I’m starting to work on my new project, The Family Album aka More Gibberish…Stay Tuned

Last week, at The Deciphering Gibberish Release Party, Poetri reminded me of a joke I made up years ago and I thought I’d share it with you.

This guy walks into to McDonalds and says ‘Let me get an Egg McMuffin and a White Sandwich.’  The cashier says ‘We don’t sell White Sandwiches.’  And the guy replies ‘That’s alright, I got my green bike outside.’ #DecipheringGibberish

I thought that was hilarious…that was a long time ago.

Talk soon and dont’ forget to pick up Deciphering Gibberish on iTunes and iBooks or at


DPL Finals and things I’m embarrassed about…

Tonight, at Da Poetry Lounge we concluded our Slam Series with the DPL Slam Finals…our team will be made tonight and the final 5 poets standing will converge on Cambridge, MA this August to compete in the National Poetry Slam…we will also try to improve on our 4th place finish last year.  Tonight’s competitors are Rudy Francisco, Javon Johnson, Terisa Siagatonu, Fisseha Moges, Imani Cezzane and Trey Bain.  3 Rounds – 3 New Poems – 1 Grand Slam Champion.  Our featured Poet of the evening is the wonderfully amazing, Carrie Rudzinski.  There have been 6 open Slams, 3 Semi Finals Bouts and now, it all culminates with this evening.  Get There Early and Spread The Word as it should be an amazing night…

Now, on to the thing I’m embarrassed about…I went to Home Depot the other day to get new blinds for our bedroom.  I picked up some 36″ width blinds and went home only to find out they needed to be trimmed.  I go back to Home Depot only to see they have the size(35 1/2″) I need and now I no longer needed to have them cut to size.  When, I returned home I realized I didn’t read the blinds were actually cut to 34 1/2″ which means they’re too short.  Now, I have to go back and ask for the blinds I originally bought and returned, only to have them cut to the correct size like I should have done 1st time through.  Embarrassing because I really should’ve read the specs instead of breezing over the specs.  Anyways, I’m off to Home Depot now…and with all the times I’ve mentioned Home Depot you’d think I have a sponsorship with them…I don’t but, who knows what the future holds…

June 11, 2013…The Deciphering Gibberish Release Party in NYC is going down…Venue to be announced but, I guarantee it will be a dope show.  I’m trying to lock down my host and a few performers.  Finals details should be revealed on Friday…either way, lock it in your schedule 6/11/13 DG NYC Release…

I really need to eat some food…so far today I’ve eaten…a bag of Sun Chips and a Hershey’s with Almonds.  Not a good diet by any means.  I’m going to eat a salad.

Yesterday, my wife and I ate at Joe’s Crab Shack which means we spent way to much money for lunch.  But, it was fantastic.

Tax time is so wack…I’m still a believer that if they didn’t help you get the job they shouldn’t make any money off of it.

I’m really just sitting here typing in my green with yellow polka dot drawers.  I hope my in laws don’t walk in.

Today, is also the release of my friend and co-host of DPL Natalie Patterson’s chapbook, Tapas.  Available online at and at DPL.  She’s going to release one new chapbook per month for the remainder of the year.

When are the good movies going to be released?  I’m in need of a good film.

Random Question:  Who uses stereo remotes in the car?  If you’re too lazy to reach and touch the buttons you have a real problem.  Now, if you’re sitting in the back and you’re given the power of controlling the stereo I can understand but, anyone else deserves a punch in the face.

FREE IDEA OF THE MONTH(I only want credit for where the idea came from):  A Coffee Table Picture Book of People Picking Their Noses

That’s all for now…be safe


The day after…

last night, the Deciphering Gibberish Release Party was amazing…the show of support from friends and family along with folks from the community was definitely overwhelming.  I haven’t had a show in LA in a long time where there were so many emotions going through me.  Watching friends perform my pieces was interesting because how I listened affected how I heard the poems.  Gimel’s interpolation of ‘Wings’ gave me an ‘I wrote that?’ moment, IN-Q telling stories of my competitive nature were funny and his reciting of ‘Flashy Words’ was classic.  Poetri reminding me of an old joke I made up brought back all sorts of memories from early 2000 and reminded me how far we’ve really come.  Natalie’s story of her going from a standing in line attendee of DPL to now, co-hosting it was inspiring.  And Javon, he did a great job hosting.  He didn’t curse up a storm and his story of loyalty was important to hear.  And Kyle’s proclamation that there is ‘no one in the world that he would die for’ but me, was heartfelt and I’m glad he came.  There were so many people who came and supported and I really could write a lot about the evening but, I just want to take the time to thank everyone especially, Trey and Krys, who got there at 6pm to help set up the space for showtime and were there until the night concluded and everything was back the way we found it.  They were so fantastic.  Sometimes, nights like those are necessary not only for the sharing but, in a selfish kind of way to see who has my back.  I’m very big on loyalty and having the people come out who did meant a lot to me.   I almost forgot, I’d like to thank Artshare LA for allowing us to use their incredible space to hold the event.  I hope to work with you again in the near future.


I’m tired so, I’m going to take a nap.  Write soon